Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Winter is Blue.


Piha Beach lies 30 kilometres west of Auckland but it feels much further away. It is remarkable for its black sand, the remnants of a 16 million year old volcano. Perhaps you remember Jane Campion’s gothic masterpiece The Piano? Piha was the star of that film. The dangerous, unforgiving canvas where Holly Hunter arrives on a Maori canoe with her beloved piano to begin a new life.

I’ve been struggling lately, with a lot of things. I don’t have a clue how most people do this thing called life. I get so caught up in it, analysing everything to make sense of it all, but really I have no idea. I’m constantly rushing around doing a million things as though one day I will finish a task and go ‘there, finally sorted this life thing out – cup of tea?’ I try to live in the moment. I’ve heard the moment is where it’s at, but somehow I get caught up in the future or start thumbing back through the past.

There are small glorious moments in life when I lose myself.





Tom and I packed the car full of guitars and food and headed out to Piha Beach for the week. We spent the mornings drinking coffee, cooking big breakfasts and listening to our favourite albums. After a long walk we spent the afternoons playing guitar and singing.




At night we watched movies. I saw Rosemary’s Baby for the first time!! How good is that film? Can you imagine Polanski pitching it to the producers? “OK, so I have this great idea for a movie, just hear me out…”

Rosemary (Mia Farrow) moves into a Manhattan apartment block with her husband (John Cassavetes) a struggling actor. There they meet an older couple, Roman and Minnie Castavet, who seem a little eccentric sure, but nice enough. After a couple of dinners at the Castavet’s things start to get a little crazy. One night Rosemary feels woozy after one of Minnie’s chocolate mousses. She goes to bed early, passes out and hallucinates she is the sacrificial sex object of a strange group ritual lead by a naked Roman Castavet.



She dreams she has sex with a horned beast only to wake up in the morning next to her husband, a little hungover and covered in claw marks. ‘Sorry!’ says hubby, we just got a little randy last night… Rosemary falls pregnant and becomes anaemic and withdrawn - OK, I won’t spoil the story in case you haven’t seen it yet, but let’s just say Scrabble boards, people going blind and a coven of retiree witches start to feature heavily in the plot line. And all there, happening right under your nose, in New York City!

I digress.




Life is complex and random, a little like the plot line of Rosemary’s Baby. It’s often passionate, wild and beautiful like The Piano. But most of the time it’s just doing the drill, ‘pressing on regardless’ as my Dad says. Moments of joy, grief and mystery amongst the laundry and the paying of bills.








85 Comments:

Anonymous Paul said...

Ahhh yes! Rosemary's Baby. What a classic thriller. They don't make em like that anymore. Peace to you Jen, looking forward to hearing what you have in store for us next.

11:14 PM  
Anonymous Jacinta said...

Nicely observed Jen, I'm not sure if I'm ever going to work this life thing out but your music certainly makes it easier.

11:15 PM  
Blogger Valerie said...

Beautifully written, Jen. I love it how films conjure up images not only of the film itself, but also how you relate to it at that moment in time.
I remember The Piano from a time I was still on my parents couch, in Europe. I remember watching it with my mother. I was mesmerised by it. The landscapes were so beautiful, so foreign from my life there and then. I never could have anticipated that 15 years or so later I’d end up living on that side of the world.

I often think I need to make more effort to live in the moment. And for me it seems a lot easier to reminisce about times past or contemplate the future. But then the times you do really live in the moment are those times you don’t think about it at all.

Keep writing. And live for those moments where life is like The Piano. Or Rosemary's baby! And at the same time try and enjoy the laundry as well.

9:19 PM  
Blogger Laura Baran said...

Jen you are such an inspiration with your honesty, wit, and depth of soul. Love you! LB

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Blogger Jen Cloher said...

Yes, that's the secret Valerie! Enjoying the laundry as much as the excitement and drama. I like doing the dishes as a meditation and for that reason have never bought a dishwasher. If I had children I might think differently..

The Piano is an absolute classic. It's been written about in all sorts of feminist cinema study journals and is still documented and referred to. I must get it out and watch it again.

12:49 PM  
Blogger Jen Cloher said...

Laura Baran, can I say I feel the same way about you too? I am always inspired by your positivity, the little weekly glimpses I come across as I stumble around the interweb. Love you x

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